


Fuck, it's Twitter

by starstruckroman



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Everyone Needs A Hug, F/F, F/M, M/M, More tags will be added later, Multi, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Has Issues, Peter Parker has PTSD, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Steve Rogers Has Issues, Steve Rogers Has PTSD, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark has PTSD, james "bucky" barnes has issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-05
Packaged: 2020-06-09 20:21:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19483306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starstruckroman/pseuds/starstruckroman
Summary: Another shitty twitterfic, because they seem semi-easy to write, and I want to write something but I have no plot ideas.If you have anything that you want to see in this fic comment it! I'll be more than willing to accept ideas haha





	Fuck, it's Twitter

**Author's Note:**

> Okay it might be obvious, but I'm going to put it here anyway. Everyone's twitter handles! (is that the right term? idk, i dont use twitter)
> 
> does whatever a @spidermancan - peter but his spiderman account  
> parker? more like @peterparkour - peter's regular account  
> destroy the patriarchy @mjones - mj  
> sticky boy's friend @gitc - ned  
> spidermanfan @flash - flash  
> tincan @youknowwhoiam - tony  
> tincant @tonyputmeuptothis - rhodey  
> jolly green @BruceBanner - bruce  
> thunder @thor - thor  
> seven hidden knives @snake - loki  
> Captain Mother Hen @SteveRogers - steve  
> bucky @jbb  
> bug bro @antman - scott  
> scott stole his @suitfromhank - hope  
> Stark Industries CEO @PepperStark - pepper  
> actual princess @wakanada - shuri  
> howdoichangemyusername @furry - t'challa  
> cosmic bitch @notaskrull - carol  
> spidermom @nat - natasha

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
**just got twitter!! mr. stark isn't here yet so i can say whatever i want until he gets here

**does whatever a @spidermancan**  
1\. mr. stark was one time so out of it that he drank a smoothie DUM-E (one of his robots) made for him. DUM-E's smoothies normally contain screws and motor oil

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
**Kid who let you get twitter??

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
**uh oh time to go

~

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
**are we just... going to accept that That Happened

**mama bear @hereandqueer  
** yes

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** i mean- okay-

**spidermanfan @flash  
** is it the real spiderman though?

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** im pretty sure im real!

**spidermanfan @flash**  
oh my god hi spider-man im a big fan

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** yeah i can. i can kinda tell because of your username

~

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** Just to clear things up; yes, that is the real Spider-Man. No, he will not be revealing his identity, because if he does I will personally make sure he regrets it.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** jeez, love ya too mr. stark

~

**Stark Industries CEO @PepperStark  
** Why is Tony crying?

**Stark Industries CEO @PepperStark  
** Oh, I see. Welcome to Twitter, @spidermancan.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** thanks ms. stark!!

~

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** tried to get verified and twitter denied it. i have not been verified in the eyes of GOD

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** @Twitter come fix your shit

**Twitter @Twitter  
** Oh. Okay.

**actual princess @wakanada  
** god didnt abandon this timeline

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** hi shuri!!

~

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** spiderman is so fucking pure what on earth

**black @jay  
** kdjhfghjdfhj i know right

~

**Stark Industries CEO @PepperStark  
** I'd like to announce Spider-Man as the newest Avenger! Apparently @youknowwhoiam appointed him such in space, and "forgot" to tell me.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** to be fair, ms. stark, he was pretty busy with the whole me being dusted thing

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** wow i really. should not have said that lmao im gonna . go

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** Spidey? You good?

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** Oh. You are not good. I'm on my way.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** thanks

~

**Captain Mother Hen @SteveRogers  
** It would be appreciated if no-one mentioned the dusting incident to Spider-Man. He has some pretty poor memories of the topic and would rather not remember them.

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** what happened to him???

**Captain Mother Hen @SteveRogers  
** That's for him to decide if he wants to share. I will not be sharing this information in his place, as it would be disrespectful. You may never get an answer, so be content with that if it happens.

**spidermom @nat  
** If i hear of anyone harassing Spider-Man about what happened, I will find you.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** aw thanks spidermom

**i never miss @betterbird  
** she's crying

**spidermom @nat  
** No I'm not.

~

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** ive decided i will share a bit of why the incident is so uhhh traumatic

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** did anyone who got dusted feel it? like were you aware of it happening, was it painful

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** no?

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** i could feel it. my body was like . trying to piece me back together as it was happening. it took a lot longer than everyone else. my spider sense (precognitive sense that allows me to dodge really well and senses when im about to get attacked) was freaking the fuck out

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** i can talk about it, its just whenever its mentioned without a warning that freaks me out. i uh . get nightmares and panic attacks bc of it.

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** oh shit

**starry skies bitch @starstruckgay  
** are u okay though??? like do you need therapy

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** cant afford it

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** I'm right here.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** and i oop- gotta blast

~

**parker? more like @peterparkour  
** hey twitter!!

**spidermanfan @flash  
** oh god. not you. why couldn't you stay away from twitter

**parker? more like @peterparkour  
** and i oop-

**destroy the patriarchy @mjones  
** flash fuck off

**sticky boy's friend @gitc  
** hell yeah mj get him

**spidermanfan @flash  
** @gitc what does your username mean. also "sticky boy's friend"????? who tf is sticky boy

**sticky boy's friend @gitc  
** spider-man, obviously. my username isn't any of your concern lmao

**spidermanfan @flash  
** lmao yeah right, like you're spiderman's friend.

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** he is, actually

**spidermanfan @flash  
** omg spiderman i'm so sorry-

**sticky boy's friend @gitc  
** @spidermancan sup dude

**does whatever a @spidermancan  
** @gitc sup. hi @mjones

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** @flash You wanna explain why you were talking to Peter like that?

**spidermanfan @flash  
** @youknowwhoiam oh god hi mr iron man

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** @flash God, you're worse than Peter with that. Don't speak to Peter that way again, or I'll make sure you regret it.

**spidermanfan @flash  
** @youknowwhoiam yes mr iron man sir

~

**BuzzFeed @BuzzFeed  
** Who is @peterparkour? Why do @youknowwhoiam and @PepperStark know him? Does Peter know the rest of the Avengers? Stay tuned to find out!

**parker? more like @peterparkour  
** omg im on buzzfeed

**tincan @youknowwhoiam  
** Oh no-


End file.
